Just Some Broad

I’ve only ever been camping once in my life. It was a pretty lousy experience because nothing really went right and I just didn’t go with the right people, so eventually I’d like to go again with people who’d actually be fun to go camping with.

When I was a kid, my neighbors across the street were a woman, her boyfriend, and her son. The boyfriend was an older man who always seemed so crotchety and short-tempered to me, it wasn’t till years later that I realized he probably didn’t like children. The son was my age, so we grew up together, which meant we were always together and probably drove this dude insane, I know we were obnoxious sometimes.

One day Mr. Crotchety had a friend visit from the Netherlands, and they decided to go camping. I don’t know if my friend’s mom told him to bring us kids so she’d have the house to herself or if he thought maybe it’d be a good way to bond with us, but it ended up being the four of us. I don’t know why my friend’s mom didn’t join us, but that doesn’t matter.

Our destination was supposed to be some sort of empty circular patch of space in the desert that I suppose is known as a good camping spot, but we ended up getting lost because Mr. Crotchety didn’t actually have any idea where he was supposed to go. This was long before smartphones and dashboard GPS’s, so our only option was directions from the internet and actual maps. I don’t know what happened, but I can only assume Mr. Crotchety hadn’t actually printed out any directions, so we ended up lost and basically just picked a random spot in the desert to set up our stuff because it was already pretty dark.

Mr. Crotchety had the idea that we should explore, but with our flashlights off. I guess he thought our eyes would adjust, but me and my friend kept turning on our flashlights because we kept thinking we saw snakes or holes or other things you didn’t want to step in. He got mad and actually made us go back to where we’d parked while he and his Netherlands friend explored. By the time they got back, we all decided to go to sleep, and my friend just wouldn’t shut up about how freezing it was since we didn’t have tents, just our sleeping bags. Mr. Crotchety practically threw the car keys at his head and said to sleep in the car, and that’s where my friend spent the rest of the night. It took me forever to fall asleep because I was totally convinced I’d wake up to find some animal chewing on me. That didn’t happen, but waking up still sucked because wow is the sun bright when there isn’t a roof blocking it from your eyes.

Going to the bathroom was an issue for me. I was too shy to just squat behind a bush, so I just didn’t go. Not until later when I ended up wetting myself in the car while sitting on someone else’s sleeping bag. I remember not even being that embarrassed, but I was embarrassed enough that I didn’t actually say anything. And neither of them ever brought it up, so I never found out whose bag I peed all over.

We ended up passing the empty patch we were originally aiming for, it turns out we were only about half a mile from it. We had to spend the rest of the drive home in silence because Mr. Crotchety was so pissed about that.

Dreams have the ability to motivate us, scare us, entertain us and occasionally even mess with our heads. Dreaming about being thin can help you get back on your diet, dreaming about being chased by a bad guy can cause us to sleep with the lights on (even if we’re well beyond our teenage years), but what does dreaming about sex with our ex mean and what will it motivate us to do?

As I write this, I am coming down from last night’s dream, where I dreamed about an ex, or rather “the one who got away.” It is a dream that has and will continue to mess with my head for the rest of the day, if not, week.

Why, even when we are perfectly happy alone or in relationships, do our exes pop up into our self-conscious? They could be exes from weeks ago, months ago or even years ago; no amount of time makes them off limits for your dreams. What’s worse for me is the fact that if one shows up, they will all show up in that dream like an army of relationship ghosts haunting me when I’m most vulnerable. I have been having a lot of ex dreams recently, so I thought it would be fun to do a little research and see what sex-with-your-ex dreams really mean.

Dreaming about an ex can bring up old feelings, make you mad or even make you wonder if you’re supposed to be with them, but dreaming about them does not mean you should run to pick up the phone the morning after. Instead you should become a little introspective. Are you still reeling from the way things ended? Do you have some unfinished feelings to work through on your own? Have they instilled a sense of distrust in you? What’s going on in your head when it comes to your ex? Be honest with yourself, analyze their actions in your dream and see if you have some issues you need to work through (with or without involving them).

Look at the external factors in your life if your ex is long gone and you’ve already moved on. Have you recently jumped into a relationship? If so, dreaming about an ex can signify that you’re a little apprehensive about doing so or that you’re clearing your head mentally for this new relationship to move in. You’re also more likely to dream about your ex if you are currently on the fence with a relationship or feel like it is coming to an end.

Sex with an ex can also represent something that you’re missing in your life like spontaneity and excitement. Perhaps your current sex life has become a little ho-hum, while your ex sex life was a whirlwind of adventure, role playing and toys from adameve.com. It doesn’t necessarily mean you want to have all of those things with your ex again, you just need to take some of those aspects and implement them into your current sex situation.

Finally, ex sex dream can represent a characteristic that you most associated with them that you now see in yourself. Such as, if they were untrustworthy or unreliable–this can be your subconscious’ way of letting you know that you internally feel like you’re taking on some of those attributes. Look at your recent behavior and see if there is anything you need to change.

So where does my ex sex dream fall? Well I’m currently on the fence with my own relationship and might run into “the one who got away” this weekend. I don’t know that it means we’re meant to be together or that my current relationship is supposed to end, what I do know is that this ex dream and all the subsequent ones to come will continually shake me until I can make a few key decisions.

What do you think your ex dreams mean?

Yesterday my mom and I got new phones. Happy birthday to me! (It’s in a week.) What had started out as a quick trip to Costco turned into a two hour trip after seeing the phone kiosk and deciding to finally upgrade. Our previous phones were both 5+ years old, we hadn’t upgraded in years and although Mom’s phone still worked fine, I badly needed a new phone. This is our first time owning a smartphone. We’ve spent the past 24 hours totally confused and absolutely loving it.

We both got the Samsung Galaxy S III (click here to read the CNET review), which is really handy because we can teach each other as we learn how to do more.

I can’t help but feel a little ridiculous, I’ve never bothered putting a protective case over any of my past phones so I feel like I’ve put this thing in a little dress. I understand the importance, it’s just a new experience. There’s also the hilarity of searching for good/interesting apps on my desktop and then downloading them on my phone. I’m loving it though.

Finally owning a smartphone means I was finally able to join Instagram, so feel free to follow me (or bookmark it if you don’t have a smartphone).

This might be triggering for some, and I apologize for that.

When I was a child, I dreamt that my father was murdered. It was night, and I seem to recall I was searching through the house trying to find my dad so I could tell him dinner was ready. I couldn’t find him, so I figured maybe he was in the backyard. I opened the backdoor and immediately got the feeling that I shouldn’t call out for him, I could feel that something was wrong. I looked to my left toward the edge of the yard, and although that area was pitch black, I could see a pair of eyes and gloves straight out of a cartoon. The eyes were white with black pupils, and looked angry. The gloves were oversized and bright white, almost like Mickey Mouse’s gloves but not quite that big. Despite not being able to see anything else, I knew this person was evil and had killed my father. I didn’t actually see my father’s body, but something just gave me that feeling. I ran back inside trying to find my mother, for some reason the layout of the house was different so I had to loop around to find the kitchen. I found her and tried to tell her what happened, but my mouth wouldn’t open, almost as if I didn’t even have a mouth. She asked if something happened to my father and I nodded furiously, pointing to the backyard. At that point, I woke up. Luckily, my father is very much alive. I really have no idea what might’ve caused this nightmare, and luckily it didn’t scare me too badly, but to this day I can’t help but avoid that part of my backyard at night, even with the outdoor light on.

Five years ago today, I bought my first betta fish. I named him Sammy, short for Salmon Roll. Sammy was my first fish who was actually mine, I’d had some rather boring goldfish and guppies as a child but I didn’t take care of those at all, I was just too young to care about doing anything other than watching them swim so my dad did all the work. Sammy and I went through a lot together but he was a tough fish, he pulled through everything, including the time I’d overfed him with bloodworms (bettas don’t stop eating when they’re full because in nature they don’t know when their next meal is, so they just keep eating, so they can literally eat themself to death if you don’t stop feeding them) and the time I dropped him on my desk while trying to get him back in his tank after cleaning it. He died September 1st 2010 and I buried him in an empty breathmint tin in my front yard. Yes, I buried a fish.

These pictures were all taken the first five months I had him, I loved watching him change from a shy stumpy-tailed fish to a flowy-tailed sparkly drag queen.

This song was written in 1978, and ended up becoming famous in 2006 thanks to the internet. I figure that’s when I first heard it myself, and every so often I end up getting the song stuck in my head somehow. I think the best part is how the dancers accidentally steal the show.

This has become my free time lately. I’ve started playing Animal Crossing: Wild World again after a very long hiatus. I decided to start over because I wanted to rename my town, which you can’t actually do without restarting the entire game. So I’ve gone back to yelling things like “Damnit, Nook!” and “Who the hell is Nibbles? Did I get a new neighbor?”

I bought an Action Replay, so I no longer have to worry about things like Resetti bothering me if I decide to reset without saving for whatever reason, that was always annoying because it’s like five minutes of him ripping you a new asshole, how dare you reset!

And by the way, these are pretty much the most hilarious drawings I’ve ever seen. If you’re a fan of Animal Crossing and Homestar Runner, you need to check these out:

• Strong Mad as Resetti
• Bubs as Nook
• Coach Z as Redd
• KK Limozeen, probably the funniest one

But anyway, if you play AC:WW and want to trade Friend Codes, let me know! Especially right now, I need someone to shop at Nook’s so I can get the final upgrade.

This is from an episode of the tv show You Bet Your Life, this version aired from 1992-1993. The first four minutes of this video had me laughing so hard. I don’t know whose expression is funnier, Bill Cosby’s or Marcia Brody’s.